.Love Conquers

Just as things start to spiral, a touch of reality can slam me back into place.
Thank god for the Love I am surrounded with!
With two healthy children, a functional & beautiful marriage, cars to drive and a house to sleep in..food on the table, the rest just deserves to be put on the backburner.  Fortunate does not seem to cover it. Blessed is more like it.
Things seemed to have taken a rough turn in the last couple of weeks.  Sebastian's behavior was not up to par.  The tantrums and fits seem to spawn from no where, after we had come so far.  I feared regression like I never had and just prayed for this phase to pass.  But then, as per usual, I kick myself.  How can I wish away these years? The toddler age is so innocent, so sweet.. and SO frustrating!  There is no reasoning with my determined child, on any matter.  What to wear, where we are going, what to eat, what cup the juice is in.. simple things that may seem very trivial, but after spawning an argument, these things become exhausting and incredibly annoying!  After a few weeks of utter frustration with the fact Sebastian and I cannot seem to agree on ANYTHING, I've realized.. I have to take a step back.  I have to appreciate.  I have to laugh this off! At the end of the day, just telling another person why I got so frustrated is humorous.  Really? Your 3 year old pissed you off because he refused to put on his clothes? There are much bigger stressors in the world!  And then it comes full circle.
As Sebastian has fully devoted all attention and energy into being onery and defiant.. he has also made some huge milestones.  He is breaking into his social scene and interacting with EVERYONE!  He likes to be the center of attention [no surprise there].  He also drew his first self portrait, which is also his first cognitive drawing.  He told me where he was putting his eyes, nose, mouth, ears, hair, arms and feet..and viola! this masterpiece is the equivalent of my artistic abilities! At age 3!  This Mama is so impressed. And totally forgives the million dollar meltdowns happening every 30 minutes.  We will get through this, kid ;]
Ms. Thang is really becoming quite the academic. She continues to amaze me with how fast she picks up on things.  In 6 short months she has gone from reading practically nothing [and no interest, either] to reading 1st grade level books with a little assistance!  She has become fascinated and it's something that seems to slow her brain down a bit and make her focus.  It is so impressive and sweet to watch her struggle, then overcome a difficult read.  That's my little bookworm!  As for the sassiness, well, I did say she was amazing. She is so sly in the way she retaliates.. it is hilarious!  We are going to have a HANDFUL come pre-teen years.  Ah well, my sense of humor is growing quickly!
I took Olivia to see Annie, which was our first live theatre together!  She was definitely captivated, and I think we now share a passion!  She's been cracking me up trying to recall the music "It's a not-fair life for us, it's a hard, cold life for us! Instead of cookies, we get tricks!"  and keeps asking if I can get her into "on stage"  as her next extracurricular.  Let's see what Mama comes up with!
Watching a show that I performed in has left this burning desire I can't extinguish.  I'm so very tempted to audition for RENT in March.  Being my favorite musical, I'd be happy just to pull the curtain just to be a part of it.  I'm sure that rehearsals with conflict with my single-mommy time though, and this makes me so sad.  Ah, well.. at least I already have tickets to the show ;]
Not sure if I have shared in the blog world yet or not, but this woman finally made a decision [hard to come by, I'm soo indecisive..] I'll be returning to school this year!  Going into the Occupational Therapist Assistant's program and could not be more excited!! Classes will be down the road and it will help me immensely to learn and grow along side Sebastian.  I'll be weaning away from Bail Bonding this year, so far have kept incredibly busy with Process Serving, but I hope to have time to apply to be a substitute teacher/para for Sebastian's school to get some awesome experience in.  I cannot wait for this chapter in life to unfold!
Sending nothing but LOVE into the Universe! May it hit you like a ton of bricks.

<3
C